Emotional Health – What Millions Still Don’t Know

by Mark I Myhre on September 10, 2013

 

emotional healingMore and more I’m seeing people talk about feeling your feelings, rather than avoiding them.

Which is great.

But too often, the motivation for feeling your feelings is so you can get rid of them… so they won’t be a hindrance… so they won’t slow you down.

Rather than being a source of power, emotions are still seen as something that gets in the way. Like friction. And feeling your feelings becomes little more than a way to reduce your friction.

Many people still see emotions as being like some sort of unnecessary body part, like their appendix.

Maybe there’s some reason for emotions to existence, but I’ll be damned if I can figure out what it is.

Maybe emotions are the price you pay for being here on this earth.

Basically, emotions are still seen as something to be eliminated in the most elegant way possible. So you can get back to living your life. So you can fit in.

The Clever Solution To Emotional Healing

As more people are discovering, you can ‘get rid of’ errant feelings such as fear by feeling it in your body. If I feel fear in the middle of my chest, for example, then I want to focus on that physical sensation in my body.

It’s not a bad idea at all. When you first begin truly changing your relationship with your emotions, you realize you want to be feeling as much as you possibly can. And a great place to start is by feeling the bodily sensations that come up around your emotions.

“I want to feel more.”

And the easiest thing to feel is what’s going on in your body. Therefore… I want to breathe deeply and fully, to get centered and balanced and focused in the present moment…

Then… I want to notice – where in my body am I feeling the feelings? Often, but not always, it will be in the chest and solar plexus. Okay, fine. Let me give attention to those physical sensations.

What’s the shape of these sensations? Round? Oval? Jagged? Asymmetrical?

What’s the substance of these sensations? Wooden? Dense? Heavy? Light? Metallic? Glass-like?

More importantly, what’s the voice of these sensations? Wailing? Whining? Crying? Screaming? Raging? Moaning?

If you really give attention to the voice of these physical sensations, a funny thing happens. Namely, you get closer and closer to realizing these are not inert side effects of some unknown bodily function.

You start to realize these are tiny pieces, little snippets of your consciousness you rejected some time in the past. At some point in your past, you pushed away these feelings. But they didn’t just shrivel up and die.

Because they are part of your consciousness!

That anger you’re trying to get rid of… that fear you hate… that depression and despair that scares you so… they’re like little children. They’re like your little children.

They have nowhere else to go but to you.

And if you don’t deal with them, you find yourself in the same situations over and over. The scenery might change, but the energy behind the physical scenery doesn’t.

Somebody makes you mad. Something happens and you get overwhelmed with fear. Some invisible pitcher throws you a curve ball and you sink into despair and despondency and depression.

However it happens, it’s the same story line over and over. The individual actors may change, the setting may be different, but the plot remains the same.

Those little parts of your consciousness aren’t giving up. They have nothing else to do but try to get you to let them come home. There’s almost a magnetic attraction between those lost separated feelings, and your heart. It takes more and more effort to not feel. Too much of your power gets diverted into keeping your walls in place.

Those feelings you push away want to come home. Just like a little child always wants to get closer to mommy and daddy. Unlike a child, however, these feelings seep in through the cracks and crevices. You have to devote more of your resources to keeping them out.

Or…

You could just say enough is enough. How many decades have I suffered? How long have I blocked my feelings? How long have I walled off my heart?

How long have I separated from myself?

Maybe it’s time I said WTF… what have I really got to lose by feeling my feelings? What would really happen if I dropped some of my stories about my emotions? I know what my ego tells me would happen… because it comes up whenever I consider the possibility:

“You’ll get lost… you’ll get stuck… it won’t help any… it only makes things worse…”

I’m here to tell you – once you make that fundamental decision to establish a new, healthy relationship with your emotions – your life changes in that instant. It might be a small change, but a shift does happen.

You change the direction of your life when you choose to let yourself feel your feelings cleanly and clearly, without the taint of trying to control them instead. And, at first, if all you can do is feel the bodily sensations, then that’s a great place to start.

But please, please, don’t go at it with the idea of ‘I’ve got to get rid of these negative feelings that are holding me back’. Because you’ll reach a point of diminishing return. And then you’re going to stop doing it altogether.

Instead, go at it with the mindset that these feelings I feel in my body are little parts of my consciousness that want to reunite with me. If I will let them come home, then we merge into one, and I am more powerful for doing so.

I become wiser, happier, more powerful, more centered, more clear, more balanced… and life becomes easier… when I allow these feelings to come home. You don’t want to get rid of the feelings; you want to integrate with them. Like a puppy dog lapping up warm milk.

 

When you separate from your feelings, life gets painful. When you feel your feelings, when you embrace them as a long-lost son, the pain heals. It really is that simple.

 

Maybe you’ll find, as I have, that once you really start feeling your feelings, I mean really, truly, feeling your feelings, you never go back. You want to feel more and more. It never levels off and it never reaches a point of diminishing return. You just keep feeling deeper and deeper.

And because you’ve long since healed any emotional pain, you are able to feel as deeply as you want without being at sufferance of your emotions. You can even feel other people’s pain without it hurting you. You don’t bob up and down like a cork on the surface of the water. You stay pretty steady. You feel what you want to feel almost all the time. And when you don’t, it’s still okay.

World events don’t tear you to pieces like they used to. The horrors of the world become opportunities; as you siphon off some of the intense suffering and use the essence of worldly suffering to become more powerful yourself. While at the same time you’re helping to heal the world.

Emotional Healing Creates A New You

You can become a new type of anchor, a new type of beacon. An anchor of safety, and a beacon of hope. You can become a conduit and a channel for more love and more healing to come into the world.

These are some of the benefits that can happen when you allow yourself to open up your heart and let yourself receive what is already there. Now admittedly, at first there may be some unpleasant sensations as the clogged energy comes up. There may be mountains of hurt, for example, that you stuffed down to survive childhood.

But you don’t have to feel it all at once. You feel what you can, as you can, in each present moment. You feel what comes up. That’s what’s most important. Don’t worry about what might happen; focus instead on what is happening. Don’t let your ego knock you off track.

You can be that anchor, that beacon, that channel, that conduit, to allow greater healing in a world so desperate for healing. You can be that source of inspiration for others. But first you need to get clear inside yourself.

There’s no better feeling in the world than waking up, remembering who and where you are, and getting excited about it. When you live with passion, life gets easier and the fun returns.

It all starts with developing a new relationship with your emotions. Which you can do any time you want.

Another thing you can do is click one of the buttons below and help spread this message. Because I want as many people as possible to know emotions are the answer, not the problem. Life is an emotional experience.

Thanks!

 



{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

Amy September 11, 2013 at 4:26 pm

Excellent as always! 🙂

Reply

Mark I Myhre September 18, 2013 at 12:10 pm

Hi Amy,

always good to hear from you

Reply

Riana September 11, 2013 at 4:49 pm

Well said! I like the way you lay it out, explain it all. Easy to follow. Thank you:)

Reply

jenny September 11, 2013 at 7:45 pm

Thanks Mark,

As always, you could not have stated your case more eloquently and clearly.

I will definatley pass it on.!!!

Jenny

Reply

Mark I Myhre September 18, 2013 at 12:10 pm

thanks, Jenny!

Reply

Janice September 12, 2013 at 1:36 am

Hi Mark,

It is always good to receive profound inspiration from you. I have not thought about my emotions as a “voice.” As I read your post, It begins to make sense to me. I have been putting my emotions on hold and not going back to them. It is time for me to become very attentive and connected to my emotions. I am sure now that they will help me as I help them.

I am taking a small step now!!!

Thanks,
Janice

Reply

Mark I Myhre September 18, 2013 at 12:12 pm

Hi Janice,

it’s good to hear from you, and I’m glad to hear you’re making that small step

Reply

damian September 13, 2013 at 11:22 am

thanks for your understanding and clarity,
i have always found your words useful and
very positive.

i have tried to put some of this advice into practice
over the years i have been reading.blessings!

Reply

mindy September 17, 2013 at 5:26 pm

How can I get over the sudden death of my sister….. I cry everyday…. and feel so broken…. ,, thank you for any help!!!, bet, mindy

Reply

Mark I Myhre September 18, 2013 at 12:36 pm

Hi Mindy,

I’m sorry to hear about your loss.

When something of this magnitude happens, it creates a certain volume of grief that you’re just going to have to integrate with, if you want to move on. The length of time it takes to go through this volume of grief is up to you. You could feel a lot of grief quickly, or a little bit of grief for a long time.

If her death recently happened, then it’s understandable you would be overwhelmed with emotion.

The key here to healthy processing, though, is to be whelmed, rather than over-whelmed.

Meaning, you want to be filled with emotion, and let it pass through you, rather than feeling like you have too much emotion to process.

However, if it’s been several years since she passed to the other side, then you need to ask yourself what are your true intentions here. Do I want to stay broken-hearted, or do I want to heal? And what comes up when I ask myself that question?

Two things that delay or inhibit healing in a tragedy like this:

1. There’s still a link between my heart and the other person’s heart. Even if they’ve passed to the other side.

2. I’m not feeling my feelings cleanly. In which case, I need to look at what I’m telling myself when I go through my grief.

Obviously, your situation is unique, and I don’t know the details so I can’t really comment too much without talking to you.

I wish you well and most of all, I would remind you that you are loved.

Reply

Leave a Comment

Previous post:

Next post: